fanfiction.net - это так прекрасно. Читаю фанфики по Плоскому миру на английском...
Чайчай, попавший в наш мир и заставивший пятнадцатилетнюю девочку-фанатку Терри вести его к Ниагарскому водопаду - это аццкое ня.

Просто убившие цитаты:

"Jonathan, you can't solve every problem by stabbing people!"
"People have told me so, but they never get around to proving it."

***
/ Титайм попросил Джерилин помочь ему с убийством. /
"Can't you do it by yourself?"
"Of course. But it would be less el-" He stopped at her glare. "-less neat." he amended. "And more people would die." He added that last bit as an afterthought. She still looked uncooperative, so he also said, "Including you and your family."
"I guessed as much. What's the job?"
He raised an eyebrow. Jerilyn raised a hand to her mouth in mock disgust at her words.
"What service is there to perform?" she corrected herself.

***
"Lupin is a 'softie'. Go to his house, play the part of the injured and lost teenager, and lead him to the spot where you last saw your parents."
"Where you'll be waiting."
"Duh." he said, childishly. Well, he was Teatime.
"But I'm not injur-" Her eyes widened, and she scrambled backward. "No, no, no! Don't you touch me!"
Edna Pests, The Road.